


Irresponsible Science

by mmmdraco



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Gen, Science
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-21
Updated: 2012-11-21
Packaged: 2017-11-19 04:37:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/569176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mmmdraco/pseuds/mmmdraco
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony and Bruce start up an online series about science because Bruce has discovered Mythbusters and looks on in horror at all of their mistakes. Tony just sees it as a chance to build better science through bigger explosions.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Irresponsible Science

"Tell me that they don't actually believe that their small scale testing is acceptable for 'debunking a myth' when they haven't even run a computer simulation using the variables they haven't bothered to scale down as well as chaos theory." Bruce had his hands covering his eyes, with a gap between two fingers letting enough light in that he could still watch Mythbusters.

Tony put his feet up on the coffee table and took another handful of popcorn. "Look! They're not even wearing proper protective equipment and that ignition system really needs a stronger casing for what they're doing. Do they not even think about the longevity of it? Stress fractures, people!"

Bruce shook his head. "I can't watch any more of this. How could they let people watch this? There's going to be mass hysteria in the scientific community as soon as people who watched this start working in research labs and start to ignore protocol because they've been indoctrinated into this... This nonsense!"

"You feel that strongly about it?" Tony eyed where his scotch was sitting on the table and frowned that it wasn't in easy reach.

"Don't you?" Bruce took his hands from his face, finally, and looked at Tony.

"There's only one solution, then."

"Oh?"

...Which was how a large lab got set up in the tower with some of the latest Stark tech ready to be tested on camera. They had every safety aspect covered, all of the personal protective equipment they might possibly need, the door to the chem shower was even open and waiting. Tony slipped into his white jacket and hung a nametag on his pocket with a grin while watching Bruce eye up his own jacket. "Do I really need to wear this thing? I tend to think the jackets just get in the way in the lab."

Tony frowned. "You know we're working with fiberglass today, right?"

Bruce winced and started to roll down his shirt sleeves. "Good point."

They set up their experiments very carefully; going ahead and utilizing all of the proper things that a scientist was supposed to do. Tony picked up the remote that would start the camera and grinned at Bruce. "So, let's just wing this."

Bruce's eyebrows furrowed. "We are attempting to catalyze a reaction between sodium-"

"Which we can do in our sleep. Tell you what. You do the experiment and I'll be over here commenting on it." Tony tapped the button on the remote and grinned at the camera. "Hello, people of the Internet. My buddy Bruce and I," here he tapped Bruce's chest with the back of his hand, "are going to teach you about science. Other people have tried to do this, but trust us when we say that we're going to succeed because we are better than they are."

His palms flat on the surface of the worktable in front of them, Bruce nodded and Tony elbowed him. "First up, synthesizing a smile on this guy. Wait! No. That's advanced level biochem and we're still learning about mitosis. Moving on! Today, we're going to play with dangerous chemicals! Yes, children, if you become a scientist, you will almost certainly get to play with dangerous things." Tony's mouth quirked to one side. "I should probably also remind you that, as Iron Man, I will kick your ass if you try to do something like weaponize a shark or engage in electromagnetic countouring of the- Bruce, you didn't combine those chemicals yet, did you?"

Looking down at the table in front of him, Bruce shook his head. "No! There shouldn't be a reaction there at all. It's..." Bruce looked up at the vent above them. "That vent is closed. It's not dispersing the air fast enough, so this chemical is heating up and the size of the molecules makes them unstable enough that they're being repulsed from each other and landing in the other chemic- Ah!"

Tony grabbed Bruce and shoved him behind the blast containment wall built into the corner of the room. A moment later, there was a quick "pop" and then Tony stuck his head back out to look at the damage. "Wait, why didn't that do much?"

Bruce wandered forward to look at the experiment on the table. "Surface area," he said simply.

"Of course!" Tony looked back at the camera and grinned. "There you have it, kids, building better science through bigger explosions!"

"You're going to give them ideas. Don't give them ideas. Stop it, Tony!" Bruce tried to grab the remote from Tony.

Tony held it off to his side and laughed. "That's right, kids. Don't try this at home. Get good grades in school and come work for me!"


End file.
